its been a long time since I posted something meaningful in here… and a long time since I felt the urge to say something too … I get like this …where I feel like everything I have to say is going to end up with me either in trouble … or something else stupid. Or, like I did about a week ago… when the idea for a post comes to me I’m at work and I never remember why the time I get home what I had to say in the first place.

But i can’t sleep. I tried … really. but Ive been up and in bed listening to Bunny snore for about an hour … and then it made sense to just get up and try to say something of value… not much of value, I think … but it’ll mean something to me in the years to come … or maybe eat a donut. After yesterday I want and need a donut…

my train of thought wandered off again … or maybe I just sat here trying to think of words and I ran out of them … I run out of time thinking that I’m broken, or need fixing … and I get tired of knowing there is so much wrong with me .. then I want to write about it and I start to feel sad…