kackersmom (2:08:29 PM): what are u doing all day
HereNow GoneL8er (2:11:07 PM): i did some decorating for Davis’ birthday, went over to my store to find out how much cleaning we have to do, went over to the seminary to find out about my FAFSA and about the new paperwork i need to get filled out
HereNow GoneL8er (2:11:24 PM): i had to reorder one of my books and then get the other ones for group formation
kackersmom (2:12:56 PM): ok
HereNow GoneL8er (2:13:29 PM): everyone is complaining that one of Dr.Kims books is out of print
HereNow GoneL8er (2:13:32 PM): and she said she doesn;t care
kackersmom (2:13:38 PM): doesnt it feel unsettling to have two separate lives?
HereNow GoneL8er (2:13:53 PM): what are you talking about?
kackersmom (2:14:16 PM): well normally ones life all blends together but u have the whole davis dimension
kackersmom (2:15:37 PM): then u have your parents but the more i think about it you probably see it totally reversed because that is what u do who u are who u see and i am not around so nothing blends but the more i type the more i realize to u that is ur life so i guess the answer is no
kackersmom (2:17:35 PM): well in my head i keep trying to understand why u never have any time for me and i guess i forget the answer is your life is there and u feel our priorities are there and your choices are there
kackersmom (2:17:48 PM): your not our
HereNow GoneL8er (2:19:33 PM): I feel like i dont know where i am going or what im doing right now. Like I am going in 10 million directions and i cant figure out where to go.But i do not need to defend my choices for who im seeing and not seeing.
HereNow GoneL8er (2:19:56 PM): So i think it seems like im spening more time everywhere else when raelly im just spending a lot of time by myself running in circles and trying to figure out where to go
kackersmom (2:19:59 PM): u do what u want u want to do…..everone does
kackersmom (2:20:54 PM): i should just give it up i know. sound like a pest i know. i just feel in my defense u get my hopes up and then nothing ever comes of it – know what i mean?
HereNow GoneL8er (2:21:52 PM): yes i know what you mean. and i know im a terriable daughter and i screw everything up. and i am unaccountable and i’ve heard it from everyone lately because i feel like im loosing my mind. You just dont hear what im saying you just dont listen. I’m trying to tell you something about what bothers me and its not about that!!! its never about that! Why cant it be that I feel this way and need something else … but it never can be what i feel can it
HereNow GoneL8er (2:21:59 PM): all i can do is KEEP TRYING to get it all together
HereNow GoneL8er (2:22:08 PM): thats all i can do and its never good enough for anyone but its all i can do
kackersmom (2:22:17 PM): i dont beleive i ever said u were a tge terrible anything ..ever ever
HereNow GoneL8er (2:22:29 PM): well thats how i feel sometimes
HereNow GoneL8er (2:22:47 PM): like all i do is screw everything up because i dont know what to do with this degree or how to get it all done on time and everything else.
HereNow GoneL8er (2:22:49 PM): so i just go ballistic
kackersmom (2:22:51 PM): and i dont know why u are feeling like u are going nuts now when class in not in session and u arent working l000 hours
kackersmom (2:23:22 PM): i dont know what u are taling about when u say EVERYONE either
HereNow GoneL8er (2:24:38 PM): i just get overwhelmed knowing school is starting again , its just me. Nevermind…
kackersmom (2:24:41 PM): u put too much pressure on yourself for school and u know u do well and yes u work hard…..and believe me i really really try to leave u alone but i have feelings too. i even went and bought my own terra tints yesterdayy instead of bothering u about it
HereNow GoneL8er (2:25:48 PM): yes i put too much pressure on myself