I hate when I feel like the theme of the day is “OFFICIAL AIRING OF GRIEVANCES” …. because I look back in my journal and all I see is negative crap … but, then I realize it’s not that it’s all negative it’s that I’m not scared to talk about it, or brush it under the rug. Everyone deals with idiots, and people who feel so sorry for themselves they bring everyone else down around them. So, I think you all know where I’m going with this.
I have friends.
Like everyone else with friends, I tend to flock towards other people like me … people with neurological problems, people with disabilities, and people who like the same things I do. There’s a small problem with that…. most of my friends have neurological problems, or are disabled.
Yes, I know. That sounds bad, especially coming from me…. You’ll get it in a minute.
Everyone I know has OCD, Anxiety, Panic, C-PTSD, Depression, Tourette’s, Dystonia, Learning disabilities, processing issues, visual disturbances … and… are touchy as sin. I know I can be too… and it was worse BEFORE I got my meds adjusted again … but sometimes I just wonder how any of us with all these problems can even WANT to know each other… and GOD KNOWS the internet (as much as it makes things easier to connect to the aforementioned groups of people) doesn’t help when you’re trying to make someone understand a sensitive or emotionally charged topic.
… this is what got me off on this today …
There’s this person who I thought wasa friend of mine… and I really think he’s actually a jerk. We were talking about a mutual friend who hit finantial trouble … and he was talking smack about her… then made a comment about SSD and other people who have TS and who are on it and are lazy for not trying to work… so I asked if he thought I was lazy because of what he said… and then he got all touchy over it!! Said he’s not using social media anymore because of everything he does.
I’m sorry… but I asked for clarification and now you’re acting like everything is a personal attack. I mean, I know I have a ton of problems … like, more then I should have … but they’re all coherant…they’re all the same list of things… not a random list of disorders that just sounds like… hypochondriac to me. . but I think you have more problems then just that… I’m getting through because I’m captain of my own ship… if I can’t make myself get through this after owning this body for almost 30 years … no one else can. and I know when I need help and then deciding you don’t want to be on social media anymore because someone called bullshit on your bullshit… take it and be a man. I’m allowed to ask a question when you make a rude blanket statement.
so… yeah… can’t stand it… there’s more… I’m tired…