A new mission…

Today will be different … … … Today will be different because I know there's going to be jerking, twitching, shuttering and shaking, blinking, scratching, squeeking, chirping and probably grimacing … … … … but today i'm going to try not to care. Today… Today I'm just going to try to not care about any of it … I know what people think, and today I'm not going to care. I know that people stare… and today I'm not going to notice it … Today… Today is going to be different

Today HAS to be different because I don't think I can handle another day of the usual drama… because it hurts… and it stinks… becuse my body hurts from ticing, my face is covering in red dots from picking… but i try to laugh it off, because I'll put hello kitty bandaids on it to make other people think it's all ok … my legs hurt from the clenching, my back hurts from jerking… everything bleeds from my grimace …. and I think my boss feels like I can't do my job as well as someone else because of this…but…

today will be different… because I need today to be different… I need to try to hold these tics back asm uch as I can to pretend to be normal for a few minutes … even though no one is going to forget what yesterday looked like… I can try… I can try desprately …

so… today will be different…

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